A Deeper Bond Between Veeps

Vice President Joe Biden announced today that he and former Vice President Dick Cheney have a larger connection than just sharing the title of Vice President.  It turns out the two are not only blood relatives they are in truth conjoined twins.  Biden felt he could no longer hide his relationship with his predecessor.  "It's true," Biden said at a press conference Monday morning.  "Dick and I are conjoined twins.  It hasn't been easy for us to hide this fact but I think over the years we have done pretty well to lead our own lives."

Doctor's at the Naval Hospital in Bethesda, Maryland joined the twins for the press conference to explain how the twins are conjoined.  "Mr. Biden's right had is fused with Mr. Cheney's left buttocks," Dr. Willie Budge divulged during the question and answer session.  "It really would be a low risk operation to separate the two but until we have signed consent forms from both men we cannot operate."

When asked to comment Dick Cheney came clean.  "Yes, I will admit that Joe is my twin.  I have wanted to be separated since childhood but he just wont let go.  We are polar opposites on just about everything in life.  I'm Republican, he's Democrat.  I'm Protestant, he's Catholic.  I'm straight, he's...never mind.  About the only thing we agree on is our wardrobe."

When asked how they were able to conceal their connection for so many years Cheney replied, "Our secret is a shared sense of humor.  When we were young kids would ask me what was that thing on my butt.  Before I could answer Joey would respond with 'it's a brain tumor!'  Boy howdy he would have those kids in stitches.  I never got the joke though."